Addison & Jace ::: en route

1.) Our new Honda Civic!  After 16 months of living in Denver with only one car, Jess and I finally decided to bite the bullet and go for a second vehicle.  Jess’ mom hooked us up with a small loan at a great rate and we were able to get a great deal on a gently used 2002 Civic with less than 100,000 miles.  It only has 2 doors, but it’s super clean, and super cute!  Besides, we have the Subaru when we want to haul around lots of people, or stuff.  And it gets 10 MPG better than the Suby in city and on the highway, so I’m looking forward to getting tags on it, and getting my commute on!  

2.) Facebook.  This might sound like an odd one, but I really like being able to keep up with everyone back home, especially my family.  Jess and I are fortunate enough to talk with our immediate family pretty regularly, but FB has helped me stay on top of my extended family and friends.  (Congrats on the engagement, Blayde!)  I feel like I know some people better now that I can see what they do on a regular basis, and that’s pretty cool.  Plus it will give us something to talk about the next time I’m in town.  

3.) Friends.  When we moved to Colorado we knew it would be tough not having our wonderful friends around, and there are still some people in Columbia we miss dearly.  But in Denver we have managed to befriend some really wonderful people who have very different backgrounds from me and Jess.  Knowing these people has helped me think about things in a very new way, which has been wonderful for my personal growth.  Thank you, Denver friends!  You’re the best a girl could ask for!  : )

4.) Brunch!  Brunch has quickly and easily become my favorite meal here in Denver.  I didn’t really used to get down with this hybrid meal, and frankly I don’t really love breakfast, but brunch has become a staple of our weekend ritual.  On Sunday mornings, we call it “gay church,” because it’s usually our LGBT peeps that accompany us on this outing.  There’s one restaurant in particular that always seems to have friends there on Sunday mornings.  But there are so many good places to eat brunch here!  It almost seems that brunch is a bigger happening than a Friday or Saturday night dinner.  Actually, we’re trying a new brunch place with our friends, Shanna and LP, today!  

5.) My girls.  Jess and Izzie are the highlights of my day, everyday.  Jess is so smart, passionate, and damn good at her job.  She cares so much and works so hard.  And it’s important work.  Really, really important work.  She’s working so the future she and I imagine with such precise detail can become a reality.  She’s fighting for our relationship, our life, every day, and I’m so incredibly grateful for that.  And she loves me fiercely.  I know that she does, and for that I am even more grateful.  Izzie, too!  She gets so excited when we come home from work, and it’s nice to know that there are too “people” who love me no matter what.  I love my little family!  

So I know November is the month of thankfulness, but I always seem to be behind the curve so I’m just going to say what I’m thankful for today, on December 1:

1. Vacation Trip to the Carolinas. Last week, Addison and I spent a delightful week off in the Carolinas. We visited her mom in Asheville, NC; her dad and stepmom in North Augusta, SC; and my family in Easley, SC. It was just wonderful to see everyone and spend time together. From a fabulous trip to Biltmore House to some rousing card playing to a delicious meal of no less than 20 dishes — we were treated to quite a good time. It’s tough to live far away from family and miss everyone all the time — and this visit was so rejuvenating. 

2. Denver. Although seeing family was lovely, being back in the Carolinas, even for just a week, reminded me of why we left. A genderqueer lesbian like me just doesn’t fit in the South. As a result, coming back to Denver has felt really good, really right. After just a year, Denver feels like home to me. It feels like a place that fits us. I’m so incredibly thankful that we’re here.

3. My job. Today, I celebrate two months in my new position: Deputy Director at One Colorado. I started as Online Communications Manager, then became Communications Manager, and now Deputy Director. In just a year, I have been able to learn and accomplish so much, and I’ve been given so many opportunities. After many years of wondering what my path in life really is, I’m so happy that I’ve found work that energizes, challenges, and fulfills me. I’m incredibly lucky.

4. Our friends. It’s tough to be far away from family, but it’s true what they say — sometimes you make your own family. And that’s exactly what we’ve done. With every passing weekend, our calendar fills up as we enjoy dinners and brunches, game playing and events with some of the most incredible people we’ve ever known. We’re so lucky to be surrounded by such awesome folks.

5. Addison. My wife is the most incredible person I know. Everyday, she inspires and supports me. She takes care of me when I’m sick, even though I can be a grumpy bugger. She feeds me and dresses me when I just can’t decide what to wear. She listens to me rant and rave. She makes me laugh, and she surprises me. Addison is truly my other half, and I don’t know what I’d do without her. The work that I do, the battles that I fight for equality, I’m fighting them for her and for the family we hope to have someday.

-Jess

1.) “Park and Recreation.”  Jess and I recently started watching this delight of a show, (on Netflix, of course!) and I’m really digging it!  I still love “The Office,” but I’m really enjoying this show, too.  We don’t have cable, and don’t plan on getting it until the spring of 2011 at the earliest, if we get it at all.  I just don’t feel like paying for it, especially since we can watch the shows that we like the next day for free via the internet.

2.) Veteran’s Day.  Because I work in a bank, I get all kinds of random holidays off, including Veteran’s Day!  So, thanks to our veterans, I get this Thursday off.  It’s supposed to snow here (finally), so I’m super glad that I don’t have to drive 20 miles down to Parker in yucky weather.

3.) Our amazing new friends.  Jess and I had the privilege of going to our friends Courtney and Rachel’s for dinner Sunday night.  Courtney is an amazing chef, and we were treated to 3 different gourmet pizzas, prosciutto-wrapped asparagus, and amazing white chocolate amaretto  fondue.  All of it was as good as it sounds.  And we had wine.  Yummy yummy red wine.  We have been so lucky since we’ve arrived in Denver.  We have met some really amazing people, and it has made such a difference in settling down.

4.) Our new car.  For those of you who don’t know, Jess and I traded in the Explorer, and we got a 2011 Subaru Outback.  It’s the quintessential lesbian car, especially in Colorado.  Literally 1 out of every 3 cars in this state are Subarus.  It definitely makes my 40 minute commute, each way, lots easier to deal with.  Plus it’s way better on gas mileage.  And it’s a brand new car.  Very fancy.

5.) My lovely wife.  Jessica is amazing.  She’s kicking ass at her job.  Seriously, she’s amazing.  And we just wrapped up the election, and Colorado did a lot better than anyone expected.  And Jess and the One Colorado team had something to do with that success, which is amazing.

~Addison

I’ve been working and packing for most of the day today, and I’ve had Friends on in the background. It’s one of my all-time favorite shows, and it’s often watched in my household. It provides a reassuring kind of background noise.

I suppose, though, that now is not a good time to watch season 10. Season 10 always makes me sad because season 10 is the end. The end of an era, as Monica says when she and Rachel stop living together.

At the end of season 10, Monica and Chandler move out of the city and into the suburbs, away from their friends. Not far. But still away. And it’s sad. We no longer get to be with these characters, and although the last episode tries to leave you with a sense that things will stay the same between the six, you know it won’t. Things change. People change. Life changes. It’s a sad reality.

That’s where I am today–in a sad reality. I am so excited about my new job. I am so excited about Denver. I am so excited about this adventure with my incredible wife.

But I’m also really sad. I am leaving my family. In fact, yesterday I told my mother goodbye. She’s traveling to New York next week to spend some time with her mother so she was my first goodbye. I can’t tell you how hard it is to think about my mother being so far away from me. I love her so much. She and my dad still take care of me way too much. I suppose I need to grow up, and moving to Denver will make me. But, god, will I miss my mom. And my dad too. They’re amazing people. And I’m leaving them in South Carolina while I head to the wild wild west.

It isn’t just my parents, either. It’s my sister, my brother-in-law, and my nephews. I can’t believe they won’t be 30 minutes away. I can’t believe I won’t babysit for the boys or have dinner with Allyson and Matt. Having them so close has been a treasure, and it’s one I’m losing.

Saturday is South Carolina Pride, and Addison and I will attend the march together. We will join with our friends and walk the streets of Columbia as proud lesbians. Although I know we’ll meet new people and make new friends in Denver, it’s so hard to think about leaving the ones we have. In the past year, we’ve grown so close to so many people, and it is those people that make Columbia what it is. I’m thinking of Rachel saying goodbye to everyone on Friends when she was planning to move to Paris. Addison and I will be saying goodbye. But we won’t be turning back like Rachel. We’ll be moving forward, even though we know it is going to be so difficult.

On Saturday, we will be walking with SC Equality, and this will be my last official act as a Board member. I am so thankful for SC Equality and the effect it has had on my life. Without it, I wouldn’t have realized that my true calling is to work in the GLBT movement. Without it, I wouldn’t have met some of my best friends. Without it, I wouldn’t be who I am. It shaped me, and I hope, in some way, I shaped it, too.

I promise that I’m excited. That it isn’t all sadness. But the last episode of Friendsjust finished, and I’m wallowing after watching it, as I always do. I’ll rebound, and I’ll find my excitement and my energy again. I’ll remind myself of what Addison and I are gaining.

But for a moment, I just want to be sad. Sad for all we are leaving.

And I am.

-Jess

…down at Trustus theater in the Vista!  Jess and I had the wonderful opportunity to go and see RENT at the Trustus theater last night.  The performance was a special preview and a fundraiser for SC Pride.  So, we got to combine activism and musical theater in one evening.  How perfect is that!  In all seriousness, the cast and crew did an awesome job.  I am slightly obsessed with the musical, so I was expecting a lot, and they delivered.  I was especially impressed with the actors who played Collins and Angel.  I always cry when Collins sings his solo of “I’ll Cover You” at Angel’s funeral, and last night was no exception.

The other cool part of last night is we got to see some of our friends.  We rendezvoused with Nekki and Francie, and we also got to see Justin.  Nekki helped us “work” the room, so we met a lot of people who have been really important in developing the GLBT community in Columbia.  We met a man who had been with his partner for 37 years, monogamously.  Which, as I’m sure you know, is a pretty big deal for gay men!

All in all, we had a blast!  RENT was amazing, and it was more than fun to hob-nob with the gays.  I love love love this musical, and I highly recommend it to anyone who thinks they might enjoy it.  The show doesn’t officially open until Friday and it continues it’s run through January.  To buy tickets for yourself (and a dozen of your closest friends,) go here.

-Addison

So we did it!  Jess and I tied the knot.  Got hitched.  Took the big plunge.  We got married! Our beautiful wedding took place May 30, 2009 at my father’s house in North Augusta.  The ceremony went off without a hitch, and much fun was had at the reception by all, or so I’ve been told.

We’ve had lots of people give us rave reviews of the entire shindig.  People have said they loved the hand fasting part of ceremony (thanks to Jess for coming up with a way to incorporate the ancient ritual). Others have said the food was excellent (unfortunately, I didn’t get a chance to eat any).  And pretty much everyone has said wonderful things about the garden.  I tend to forget how amazing Dad & Mary Alice’s yard is until new people come to see it and get all amazed.  It truly does give Riverbanks Botanical Garden a run for its money. We’re so thankful we were able to have it there.

If you attended, we would love to hear your thoughts, too.  What were your favorite moments?  What did you like best?  Tell us, tell us!

Because there were SO many memorable moments at the wedding, Jess and I decided to give out some “awards” to our guests and hosts, and we’d like to share them with you.

And the award goes…

To Ellie Cook for being the best dressed mother ever.

To Bob Cook for dancing the coolest twist in town!

To Allyson Stanley for making us laugh out loud during the most stressful of times.

To Cole Stanley for being the cutest kid in the world, period.

To Anne McClearen for falling like a pro (and she’s got the bruises to prove it!).

To Caroline Woodrum for covering our car with fabulous (albeit dangerously distracting!) “Just Married” decorations.

To Mary Alice Woodrum for creating a magical, beautiful garden over the past 30 years.

To Bear Woodrum for being the best host anyone could ask for.

To Linda Haynes for giving the best catwalk during “I’m Too Sexy”!

To Dana Lang for making friends with everyone in attendance.

To Tucker Mathis for serenading us with a riveting late-night vocal performance.

To Jimmy and Lindsay McClearen for traveling so far (from Michigan!) to celebrate with us.

To Steven Shields for being willing to do anything that needed to be done while preparing for the big day.

And…of course…thanks to all of you who came and to all of you who read the blog.  We appreciate all the happy thoughts and well wishes you send our way.

-Addison