Addison & Jace ::: en route

If you know me well, you know that I take charity. I’m not too proud to take money when someone offers it. My parents, my friends, my bosses. You want to give me money? Awesome. You want to take me to a meal? Great. You want to do something for me? Bring it on.

It’s how I am. I let people show their love in whatever ways they’d like, including giving me money and gifts. I’m not too proud to admit that I’m poor, and I’ll take whatever I can get.

Even though I’ll always take charity, I don’t often ask for it directly. But I have been of late. In fact, I’ve been doing a lot of asking people for money. Just not for me and Addison.

I’m doing some major fundraising for SC Equality for the month of December. We’re doing an end of the year push so that we can start 2010 on sound financial footing, poised to do some great work.

I’ll admit I was scared to death to ask people for money, but it hasn’t been as bad as I thought it would be. The people in my life have really stepped up. My parents, Addison’s mom, and some of my colleagues and friends have all been willing to answer the call. If any of you guys who have given are reading this, please know that you’re awesome. Your support means more than you know, seriously.

Although I’ve been having some pretty good luck fundraising over the last several days, I’m sure that feeling of debilitating fear will resurface when I actually have to call people I don’t know and ask them for money (as opposed to asking people who know and love me). I’m getting all nervous just thinking about it.

Anyway…if you want to help out and make a contribution to support the work of SC Equality (and really to support Addison and me), click here.

If you just want to tell me that I’m awesome for being involved in this generation’s civil rights movement, just leave me a comment. The nicer, the better. 

-Jess

Tomorrow is the 20th Annual SC Pride celebration!  Jess  and I will be there with bells and whistles (and other noise makers) on.  Will you?  It doesn’t matter if you’re gay or straight, the community as a whole would love to see you there!  The march starts at noon at Finlay Park.  Look for the SC Equality banner, cause that’s where we’ll be!

In other news, I’m still having that whole “crisis of self” thing.  But not really.  I’ve semi-decided on a career.  Drumroll, please…  I want to be a nurse.  Or a nurse practitioner.  Probably.  Comments?  Thoughts?  Donations?  I’m open to all of the aforementioned options.

That’s it for now.  BTW, my sister moved in with us after mom lived here for 2 weeks.  For real.  More on that drama later!  Also, our house is on the market.  Are you looking to buy?  I wish…

-Addison

I’ve been a little bummed out lately. You see, last week I was meeting with some wonderful folks from the South Carolina Equality Coalition (SC’s statewide organization devoted to advancing civil rights for the GLBT community) about joining their Board of Directors. During this brief meeting (where I had a delicious salad from California Dreaming—yummy), I was informed that the SC Republicans will most likely attempt to pass an anti-gay adoption bill in the state. This bill (which probably wouldn’t pass until 2010) would prohibit any unmarried couple from adopting a child in SC. Not surprisingly, it has quite a bit of support in the conservative state of South Carolina.

Currently, gays and lesbians cannot file jointly to adopt a child in SC. There is no law officially prohibiting it; the state just doesn’t allow it. Gays and lesbians can file as single individuals in order to adopt, but this typically requires the adopter to deny being GLBT. This new anti-gay adoption law would prohibit any single person—GLBT or straight—from adopting. Basically, the law asserts that only a married man and woman are equipped to raise a child. Not even a straight, single, successful 40-year-old career woman could adopt—much less a lesbian couple.

A law like this would be a tremendous blow to Addison and me. We want to start a family in a few years, and under a law like the one detailed in the anti-gay adoption bill, I would not be able to pursue second-parent adoption if Addison had our children, and she and I would not be able to adopt together as a couple. Effectively, we would have no way to have equal legal custody of our children. This is incredibly frustrating. We’re watching some states move forward, and it’s amazing. Vermont and Iowa have just allowed for gay marriages to be performed in their states, and it’s an exciting, wonderful time. But it feels like South Carolina is moving backward. We’re headed toward the passing of a law that would take away even more rights from the GLBT community. We’re headed in the wrong direction.

The South Carolina Equality Coalition (SCEC) is working hard, and they’ve had some significant successes. But it won’t be easy to fight the anti-gay adoption bill. Florida has had one for years. Arkansas passed theirs in November 2008. What can we do to stop one from passing here? I’m not sure what exactly, but I can’t sit around and watch anymore. I have to join the fight. I am officially beginning the process to join the Board of SC Equality. I can’t sit back any longer while the GLBT community is beaten down. I must fight back.

I don’t know what Addison and I will do if we lose the fight against this anti-gay adoption bill. I have to be honest and admit that she and I will have to seriously consider whether SC is where we want to start our family. With no relationship recognition and no adoption rights, it’s almost impossible to see how SC could be right for us. But we won’t make these tough decisions just yet. The fight has barely begun, and I am excited to be joining the ranks of the passionate people at SCEC committed to making a difference for our community.

-Jess