Jace and I headed down to Garden of the Gods in Colorado Springs over the weekend. Our favorite gay, Dan, tagged along, too. We did a lovely 2 mile-ish hike and took in some beautiful vistas! Even after being here for over a year, I’m amazed by how different the scenery is out here. Denver has gotten a lot of rain (by CO standards) lately so everything is nice and green! Flowers are blooming, the trees have leaves again, so to see how barren and desert-like it is a little over an hour away was surprising. And those red rocks are just stunning. We definitely don’t have anything like it in SC!
We capped our afternoon with a trip to Cracker Barrel. There aren’t any in city limits, so it had been over a year since Jace and I had been to one. It was Dan’s first time ever, so we were excited to show him such a Southern tradition. Growing up my sister and I sought out Cracker Barrels on road trips like we were trying to win a game! We’d beg for every toy in the store, play too many rounds of checkers, and we’d always leave with at least 10 sticks of candy. I think my Southern drawl came out at lunch; Dan seemed frightened. No worries, though! We’re back in the big city, and my voice has returned to normal! : )
I love that we get to travel on the weekends and take day trips to such unique places. I look forward to exploring more of our beautiful state!
Four Emotions I’ve Been Feeling Lately
1. Nostalgic. You might have noticed that South Carolina has been consuming the news of late. With the Republican presidential primary tomorrow, every article or story on the radio is from Columbia or Charleston. And each time I hear one, my mind drifts back to all that I loved about my home state. Summer afternoons on the lake with friends. Laughing with my sister until I cried while playing games at my mother’s kitchen table. Walking through the gardens where Addison and I were married with a glass of red wine in my hand. All the good of South Carolina floods my mind, and it makes me miss home. Of course, logically, I know I’m just feeling nostalgic. I know that, right now, South Carolina is not where I’m supposed to be. I’m not sure it ever will be again. But when I look back, I remember all the good it brought to my years — from falling in love with Addison when I was just 17 years old to driving down the interstate surrounded by sun and green trees. And I forget, just for a moment, all the bad things it brought — from a complete stranger yelling at me “You’ll never be a man” to being denied every protection and right I need to take care of my wife. Maybe it’s better to forget the bad and just remember the good. The good of youth, of family, of friends, of sunshine, of lakes and beaches and rivers, of Rita’s Italian Ice and Mr. Friendly’s tater tots.
2. Energized. The legislative session has started up here in Colorado, and I am once again engaged in a fight that I care very deeply about. For the second year in a row, my colleagues and I at One Colorado are working to advance civil unions legislation. We’re facing an uphill battle, with a Capitol that’s overwhelmed by a negative, partisan vibe, but I am energized by the process. We’re strategizing how to earn Republican support, mobilizing thousands of supporters, and telling our stories to change hearts and minds. It’s invigorating. And if our legislators listen to the 76% of Coloradans who support civil unions and pass the bill, Addison and I will rejoice, for we will have just made Colorado a better, safer place for the family we’re hoping to start.
3. Anxious. As many of you know, Addison and I are going to have to move again in May. Our landlord is selling the apartment that we love and adore. Selling it and forcing us to search, once again, for a place to live in May. I’ve known about our impending move for several months now, and it’s causing me tremendous anxiety. I wish someone had just told me in April that we had to move. That would be better. I would have panicked and worried, but it would have lasted for only a short time. As is, by the time we actually move, I will have worried about moving for seven months. I will have struggled to decide on what area of town to look in for seven months. I will have searched Craigslist for seven months. I could go on…
4. Baby Crazy & Greedy. My biological clock is tick, tick, ticking away, telling me to have a baby now, now, now. I can’t seem to stop it. Even being around crying children doesn’t help. Nope, no matter how good or bad the young one is, they make my ovaries do a little cartwheel. It doesn’t matter that I’m not ready for a baby — not emotionally, financially, or mentally — biology demands a bun in the oven. But I cannot fulfill biology’s needs. Addison has set up some strict parameters for when we can bring forth Little Woodrum, and one of her rules centers on money. We must have a pre-determined (by her, of course) amount of money in the bank before we can even create a plan for Little Woodrum. And so I’m greedy. Very greedy. Want to send me money? I’ll take it; I have no pride. Biology is gathering up every last penny and placing it in a savings account for Little Woodrum. I’ve never been quite so greedy before in my life. But maybe you’ll forgive me for this sin if I just blame it on biology?
-Jess
Denver is Different
Denver is different. While Jess and I are really enjoying our new home, there are some things about Denver and Colorado that make me go, “Huh? What’s going on here?” I thought I’d share some of our discoveries.
1.) Denver is dry. Dry, dry, dry! I know we’ve been saying that for months, but it doesn’t stop being true! Dryness is bad for skin, hair, eyeballs (contacts, anyone?). But it’s great for summer! Coming from SC, where the humidity is easily 80% or more on a daily basis, the Colorado humidity is amazing! I have to stifle my giggles when customers come in the bank complaining about 85 degree weather with 30% humidity. Coloradans aren’t used to it, but to Jess and me, it’s a welcome break from near-jungle conditions.
2.) Denver is dense. I’m not talking Manhattan dense, but compared to Columbia, we are having a downright urban experience. We have neighbors on the other side of our walls in addition to across the street. We can walk to places that sell things besides white bread and gasoline. We have to think about where to park our car. To all you land-owners this might sound dreadful, but we are really enjoying the freedom that comes with no yard work and only one vehicle to maintain.
3.) Denver is action-packed. Between the Rockies, Nuggets, Avalanche, and Outlaws, we’ve been to more professional sports games in the past 10 months than in the past 4 years. Our weekends are jammed with brunches, movies, hikes and casual get-togethers. And we are loving it! Don’t get me wrong, we miss everyone we love in SC, but it just seems that we’re getting around more here (and not in a slutty way).
I’m sure that as we continue to adjust to life in the wild, wild West we’ll find more things that differentiate Colorado from South Carolina. And I can’t wait to see what’s next.
Why I Love Colorado
It’s been ten months since Addison and I packed up our stuff and our lives in South Carolina and headed west to Colorado. We didn’t know what we’d find when we got here; we were traveling on hopes and dreams.
What we discovered in the wild west was far more than we expected. In just a few short months, we have fallen in love with Colorado. For so many reasons (listed below for your enjoyment, gentle readers), we have truly come to call Colorado and Denver our new home.
1. Colorado is a beautiful state. You’ve seen me talking about this again and again on the blog as I explore the corners of the most beautiful state in the country. From the majestic, snow-capped Rocky Mountains to Denver’s stellar skyline, Colorado takes my breath away. It really is a wonderful feeling to look around and see beauty all around you.
2. My job is awesome. We moved across the country so that I could take my job as Communications Manager at One Colorado. It was a big risk, but it’s paid off tremendously. I love my work. I love politics and advocacy. I love thinking about the right messaging and building relationships with the media. I love spending my days working for equality for families that look like mine.
3. Addison’s job kicks ass. I always knew my wonderful wife would be a success, but moving to Colorado has catapulted her career forward in a way we never expected. She got a promotion and a pay increase from the job she left in South Carolina, and she’s really kicking ass at her new job. She’s already been given leadership and growth opportunities as well as increased responsibilities. She’ll be running the place in no time!
4. We have amazing friends. Within just a few months, Addison and I have connected with really fabulous, wonderful people. We’re so lucky to have folks in our lives who accept and love us for who we are. From playing cards to going to sporting events to camping (which we’re doing for the first time in September) to drinking infused vodka, we enjoy every minute we spend with our friends.
5. Denver is friendly to LGBT folks. I may be speaking from the sheltered bubble in which I live (living in the gayborhood and working at a LGBT organization), but I have found Denver to be accepting of Addison and me. We feel safe and comfortable walking down the street hand-in-hand and being ourselves in our community. In South Carolina, I used to be stared at all the time for rejecting gender norms, but I don’t turn heads in Denver, a city that attracts lesbians who look like me as well as a slew of straight women who don’t follow gender stereotypes either. It may sound like a small thing, but it feels right to live in a community where you feel accepted and embraced for who you are, whether you follow the rules or not.
6. Denver is a place where I can see us starting a family. Colorado has a second parent adoption law, which will give us the protections we need to bring little ones into the world. More importantly, the lives we are building here are positive and stable and full of love—the perfect setting in which to bring children and to show them the beauty of the world and teach them how to love and accept others. The only thing that would make Denver a better place to start a family is if my parents were here. But I do have to admit that there is a part of me that hopes I can convince them to relocate out west once we start our family. I suppose we’ll just have to see… ;)
Addison and I aren’t willing to make any long-term plans right now—we’ve made too many that haven’t come to fruition—but for now, we’re absolutely loving life in Denver, Colorado, and we’re proud to call it our home.
Day 4, continued. More photos from the hike. See all those stairs? See the treacherous rocks we climbed? Ugh, I’m still tired.
After the hike, we quickly got ready and hit the road for our long drive home. By Day 4, we were pretty tired and ready to be home so we didn’t stop much. Puppy was restless, but we just kept going and going.
Beyond the photos of our hike, we don’t have many photos to show from Day 4. But that part of our trip was spectacular too. The scenery was really different from what we’d been looking at for the past several days, and there was something refreshing about seeing a different “side” of these majestic Rockies. To experience this beauty, I suppose you’ll all just have to come visit. :)
Day 4. Monday, June 27.
After arriving in Ouray on Day 3, we walked around town, exploring little shops and enjoying coffee and dinner. It’s an adorable little town (though perhaps a bit unaccustomed to openly lesbian travelers), but we didn’t take many photos.
Of course, I suspect Ouray is the kind of place where you really need to see it to believe it. I mean, it’s surrounded by mountains on all four sides. It looks like the town grew from the mountains or fell from the sky. It’s pretty incredible.
We didn’t have much time to play before hitting the road on Day 4, but we woke early and took a quick hike to Box Canyon Falls.
The hike was a two-parter. The first part, we walked down, down, down into the canyon to see the bottom of the waterfall. It was a gorgeous, albeit wet, walk.
The second part, we walked up. And up. And up. Your chubby friends, Addison and Jess, don’t hike much so we found this part of the hike a bit difficult. It started with more than 90 stairs and then climbing over rocks.
At the top, we saw an amazing view of the entire town of Ouray. And way down below, we could see the river into which the waterfall flowed.
Yes, more Day 3. Photos from a scenic overlook at nearly 11,000 feet.
Day 3, continued. We leave Vallecito Lake and start our trek to Ouray, where we’ll spend the last night of our trip.
To get to Ouray, we travel the famous Million Dollar Highway. Nearly each time we see a scenic overlook, we take the opportunity to look (the photos here were taken at our first two stops). And we don’t regret a single stop. Every view going up and down Red Mountain is amazing.
The drive is terrifying at times. Winding up and down the mountain, often without guard rails, is incredibly frightening. Addison and I take turns driving (don’t tell our rental car company) so that we can both experience the sights.
This is the part of the trip I was most looking forward to—this is the drive I wanted to show my wife. It didn’t disappoint her.
But, we’ll both come to realize that the Monday drive home is just as stunning (though quite different) as the drive over Red Mountain.
Day 3. Sunday, June 26.
We wake up and hit the road, driving 30 miles outside of Durango to Vallecito Dam / Lake. We’ve read that it’s beautiful.
It is. The lake nestled in between the mountains. Breathtaking.
The lake is the first large body of water I’ve been this close to since I moved away from South Carolina. The first thing I think of as I stare at this beauty is all the time Addison and I spent on Lake Murray in Columbia last summer.
We were lucky enough to have wonderful, welcoming friends who invited us to their house on the lake. We spent hours swimming and boating. We even took a two-day boat trip, riding the rivers of South Carolina all the way to the ocean; it was incredible.
Vallecito Lake reminds Addison and me of how much we miss the water. But it’s hard to come by in Colorado (in South Carolina, we had tons of lakes, rivers, and beaches). We eat up the wet air and put our feet in the chilly water.
Day 2. Saturday, June 25.
After a quick walk through downtown Durango in the morning, we spend most of the day at the Four Corners Pride Festival.
Staffing the One Colorado booth (and giving a quick speech) at the festival is the primary reason for our big lesbian road trip. A wonderful excuse to get out of Denver and explore Colorado.
After Pride is over, we enjoy dinner and do some window shopping in adorable downtown Durango.
